By: Liz Hronek
Growing up, I was always athletic.
I swam competitively since I was 5 years old and played soccer since I was 7 years old. And I was also always overweight, not looking like all of my teammates, not feeling like I really fit in. This wasn’t just an internal feeling. This was something that a lot of my peers reminded me of on a consistent basis.
I remember walking into science class in 6th grade, and this boy walking in front of me yells out “Beep Beep Beep….WIDE LOAD COMING THROUGH!” I was devastated. I also had to continue throughout the day as if it didn’t bother me and as if I was tough and emotionless.
This outer shell, this façade was built up more and more throughout my childhood. I had “thick skin”, my grandma used to tell me… “Sticks and Stones may break your bones, but words can never hurt you”. My grandma was my best friend, she was so strong, and dealt with so much BS…and would do anything for her children and grandchildren.
Ya’ll, my grandma was an OG! So I grew up thinking that that was what I had to do, stand strong. But I was hurting, I was angry! I thought it was me being angry at those who were being mean to me, but I was more angry with myself than anyone else. Why couldn’t I fit in? Why couldn’t I lose weight? Why couldn’t I be popular?
I hated myself so much… I was eating all kinds of crap. I was drinking, and smoking trying to numb my pain and anger. My self-esteem was so low, that I got into MULTIPLE physically abusive relationships, and a marriage that I wasn’t ready for, which lead to more destruction of my self-esteem and more anger.
By the time I was a junior in college I was close to 300 pounds, living in my car, working 2 jobs, in a physically abusive relationship… and I was pregnant… BUT didn’t know it until the day that I went into labor.
Since my “boyfriend” had my car, the university had to call EMS to come take me in an ambulance to the hospital. I WAS SO FREAKING SCARED!
I told the lady that checked me in that she could NOT tell anyone that I was there, and I didn’t tell ANYONE… except for my job so that they could tell my boyfriend to come to the hospital. Even then, I didn’t tell them why I was there.
What in the world was I going to do?! Most people have at least 7-8 months to prepare for a child. Me? I was living in my car and getting beaten on a consistent basis.
Needless to say. God works in mysterious ways. The hospital contacted a local church who brought me SO MUCH stuff for my brand new baby girl. The hospital let me rent a car seat to leave the hospital… This baby WAS supposed to be here!
Looking back, she saved my life! God knew what He was doing, and it is so AMAZING! I am telling you, I probably would not be alive today had I not had that baby girl. She was the reason for me to do better. I already knew that her dad was not going to be able to give her what she deserved. So, it was time for me to step up!
I took her to class with me in her car seat, took my exams, and got my degree. Not only did I get a bachelors with a minor, but I was on the deans list!
AND THEN… after I was able to get out of the toxic relationship, I committed to losing weight for the last time! No more back and forth, it was time for me to take care of me, because I had another person to take care of. My little angel!
Since then, I have lost over 150 pounds and kept it off for 10 years. I have also gotten certified in personal training and nutritional therapy because I want to help others. I want to use my journey and my struggle to help other people eliminate a lot of the mistakes I made, and move forward quickly!
3 Life lessons I would tell my younger self:
No one is more important than your peace of mind.
If you always feel drained after interacting with a certain individual… you have the power to leave that situation! Fill your circle with people who lift you up and fill you up.
Do not conform to make others comfortable, be yourself.
Do not dim your light because it is shining in someone else’s eyes. The ones that love you and are your people will grab some sunglasses and cheer you on!
Loving yourself is not selfish, it is a necessity to love others.
We cannot TRULY love anyone else if we do not truly love ourselves. It is ok to be alone, build a bond and confidence in yourself that is unbreakable. THEN… you can go out and love others the way you really want to, the way that they deserved to be loved.
Queen Guest Writer Bio:
Liz is mom of 2 awesome girls and creator of the “unDIET Challenge”. Her goal is to empower women to build the life they truly love. To learn more about Liz, visit Liz Hronek
#selfcare #healingvibes #healingenergy #selflove #fitness #health
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