When I was 12 years old, I was flogged by the police for reporting my step mother for mistreating my siblings and I.
I still have the scars from the whip on my right leg. I cried until I couldn't cry anymore. My body got accustomed to the whip. The very people that are supposed to protect a child, turned against her and sided with the villain.
OK.... I think I need a moment. My mind just went back to that day and I can't hold my tears. :-(
The flogger was a policeman. He did this in the presence of my stepmother, a policewoman and 3 policemen. All along they threatened me with juvenile detention.
After the flogging, they told me to apologize and go back with my stepmother. The mistreatment only got worse.
PS: I don't need therapy. I've studied Psychology so I've had to handle myself first hand.
A close friend was gang raped when she was 9 years old. Her uncle was paid to organize it. After that, a once bubbly and charismatic child became so withdrawn, a loner and always fighting boys and insulting teachers in school. The worst part is nobody noticed her pain. They labelled her 'notorious' and 'first-bodi' ( sheng' for invincible fighter). She was indirectly fighting her rapists by fighting boys and projecting her anger towards her parents for not protecting her by insulting teachers.
Recently, she was sexually harassed by a government official and she reported it to the relevant authorities but nothing was done. The official just got a slap on the wrist and reinstated back to work. He ensured that he made her life a living hell.
A few weeks ago, the news that made it to the front page of a popular magazine was of a 12 year old girl who was murdered hours after testifying against her rapist. A brave young girl who just wanted justice had her neck snapped for reporting a villain.
These are just but a few cases of victims treated as villains. When did this become a normal thing people should accept? Yes we can suggest counselling but what about justice? What about protecting the actual victims and ensuring that offenders don't go unpunished? What about seeing the pain in a victim's eyes and not ask unnecessary questions like, "Are you the only victim? What were you wearing? What were you doing at that place at that particular time? Did you provoke him/her?"
Does it make it less important that it only happened to an individual? So only one rape case or child abuse case can be excused?
Karma works but it takes longer so justice systems were put in place to ensure karma is accelerated; but do they function?
So I just want to ask.. If families cannot protect their children, teachers cannot protect students, law enforcement cannot protect victims and government authorities don't give a damn about the citizens' well being then WHERE ARE THE SAFE SPACES FOR VICTIMS OF CHILD AND SEX ABUSE?
#sexabuseawareness #childabuseawareness #realtalk
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Powerful article, thank you so much for using your platform to shed light on these real issues! I think a major component is to continue to talk about this topic especially from a point of healing and calling out the rapists and other abusers. And then to create that safe space for victims and coach them to heal. This will take time but it is truly needed.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your response Kim.
DeleteI agree 💯 that we need to keep talking about it.
Abusive wounds are like shadows that haunt the victims; until they are healed, only then can they disappear.
This is a very educative article. Hope in the near future our systems are put in a better order to deal with abuse. It will take time for sure but I am hopeful.
ReplyDeleteI am hopeful too. Thanks for taking your time to read it.
ReplyDeleteThe first step is to talk about it.
This article is so beautiful. I thank more of such issues should be handled and talked.
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading it.
DeleteWe all need to do our part in whatever way we can to speak up.